April 23rd, 2018
On My Mind

I Love To Lunch

Today I am attending the first of many spring lunches. I’m excited to see friends, celebrate birthdays, and help support various causes. This post originally ran February 6, 2012, but is still apt.

Why are so many women opposed to meeting for lunch? The above story, from the February 2012  issue of Vanity Fair, has great vintage images and details the history of “lunching” as a verb. But I am surprised that the women interviewed for the article wouldn’t be caught dead having lunch with their friends today.  So when do they see them? Dinner? That meal is sacrosanct in my book; family time. Breakfast? I’m an early riser and get most of my work done in the morning—I don’t want to lose my momentum by going out to breakfast.

Lunch seems to have become a social taboo, a signifier of an idle life.  This is sad to me. I love to meet my friends for lunch and try to set one up monthly. We are all as busy as the women interviewed for the story, but an hour a month wouldn’t kill any of us. Life is too short to not make time for our friends.



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Park small grained-leather shoulder bag


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Crocheted Cotton-Blend Midi Skirt


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Cropped crocheted cotton-blend wide-leg pants


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Small raffia bucket bag


Double-breasted virgin wool coat

  • How weird, I would have thought that as more people are freelance or self employed, social lunching would be more common. Maybe it’s just that a lunch with friends tends to take more than a strict hour, and people don’t feel they can spend that time in the middle of the day?

    DisneyrollergirlFebruary 6th, 2012  8:57 AM

  • I love the version of that song by Barbara Streisand & look forward to the VF article. To lunch seems civilized not idle.

    susan lavineFebruary 6th, 2012  9:29 AM

  • This was a great article in Vanity Fair. It is sad that this is a somewhat lost tradition. I love to “lunch” and for years I’ve said I aspire to be a lady to “lunches” like the women in the VF article. Thanks for a lovely post!

    Lauren@StyleseerFebruary 6th, 2012  10:00 AM

  • I have breakfast early every Saturday with my girlfriends and it is a wonderful time for us to catch up. We go to the same place each week, sometimes it’s only two of us but usually all four.

    Debbie KFebruary 6th, 2012  10:23 AM

  • I couldn’t agree more. I felt the same way when I read it. For me breakfast, lunch or a long walk are great ways to catch up with a friend…something I need to do more often.

    kayce hughesFebruary 6th, 2012  1:25 PM

  • As I work on my own most of the day I look forward to meeting my girlfriends for lunch. Where I live it seems to be a tradition that’s alive and well as all the good bistros are quite busy!

    Veronica RickardFebruary 6th, 2012  6:55 PM

  • Love this and I lunch all the time!

    Nicole FoosFebruary 6th, 2012  10:20 PM

  • This is a great post and article. Lunch w a friend is one of my favorite things!

    MauraFebruary 6th, 2012  10:42 PM

  • I love lunch on a Saturday or Sunday with the girls – one or more! Feels like you are running away!

    LizaFebruary 6th, 2012  11:54 PM

  • The tradition of lunching is still very much
    alive in my life! Perhaps it’s generational? Regional? Whatever it is I’ve been enjoying this
    important get together with friends for decades. I suggest everyone include time for your friendships and yourself.

    Wanda RawskiApril 23rd, 2018  8:38 AM

  • Although we speak often by phone now, oh how I miss those one-on-one lunches with your wonderful mother on the Vineyard. Did you know she also hosted a yearly ladies luncheon at a favorite Vineyard restaurant for all her women friends? It was a fall social highlight!

    JackieApril 23rd, 2018  8:42 AM

  • I agree that friendships in adulthood require attention and nurturing, One has to take time to keep those connections. My attitude is that everyone is busy, whether employed or not. But we all eat! Breakfast or lunch with friends is a productive activity.

    AprilApril 23rd, 2018  9:41 AM

  • The idea that lunch is “a signifier of an idle life” is alive and well still. Usually said with a sneer…”I guess now that you’re retired you’re a lady who lunches.” “Yep,” I reply, “aren’t you jealous?”

    Sue BurpeeApril 23rd, 2018  10:18 AM

  • Being able to have lunch with my women friends is one of the reasons I retired. At least once a month, I get together with one or two of my friends from aerobics class and every so often I will go to lunch with one or two of my neighbors. It’s an enjoyable way to catch up on the news in our lives. I am not exactly a “lady who lunches” but I do enjoy getting out to lunch with friends, and wear something other than yoga pants. I also meet a friend for coffee/tea on Saturday mornings twice a month. I agree with April – adult friendships need to be nurtured. It’s a mental health activity for me.

    slfApril 23rd, 2018  10:21 AM

  • Happiest of birthdays Preston – I hope today’s lunch is a celebration of you! xoxo

    KathyApril 23rd, 2018  12:36 PM

  • I love this post and the comments. Lunch is great occasion to connect and to dress for!

    karenApril 23rd, 2018  9:22 PM

  • Preston, your post is great! Women being told that things they have loved to do since the dawn of time are suddenly ‘not modern’ started decades ago. There has been a movement afoot to pressure women regarding their choice of pursuits for decades, whether it’s social lunching, marriage, size of family, career choices, joining clubs . . . The suggestion that ladies (possibly dressing up) going out to lunch is for ‘the idle rich’ is nonsense and, even if some women are idle and rich, so what? Who’s business is it what you do with your time? My mother’s generation met at one another’s homes 2-3 times a week and enjoyed coffee together while children played. Later in the day they met at the swimming pool while children took lessons. It was social and healthy and no one was forced to show up. I say it’s time to resurrect the ladies lunches! Meet at a fun spot, laugh, order a crab salad, share life stories, get advice from friends. It’s therapeutic, healthy, good for the economy. Not to mention it’s an excuse to wear wonderful clothes!

    PaulaApril 23rd, 2018  11:53 PM

  • Now that I am retired (since January), I miss the weekly Tuesday lunch I had with 2 friends from work. So…I picked them up a few weeks ago and we went out! Last week I did the same with another friend from work. Went to see a movie with a friend Saturday…we made sure to have lunch first so we could catch up.

    All of these friends are still working…I look forward to “lunching” more often when they retire!

    bisbeeApril 24th, 2018  9:07 AM


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